Finding Purpose

A friend once told me that God must have a purpose for me, after a life saving event shook me to my very core.  Major life events such as near death experiences have historically been viewed as life changing happenings.  But what most people do not understand is that this new found change is not simply a result of nearly losing life, but a consequence of one who chooses life, when confronted with death. 

 

Some things can not be seen by the eyes.  But this I know, a battle raged within me that the doctors and nurses had no power to fix or even influence, regardless of the amount of pain numbing medication.  

At one point, a black bird flew from my chest, and then some symbols came from within me and circled the bird, but it was the Eye of Ra that stood before me at five o’clock; the third eye.  The things I was seeing and feeling at that time are hard to explain, but I remember the feeling of fleeting fear as the bird bolted from within me, and an overwhelming heartfelt pain; so sad and so cold.  When I think back to that moment today, I still feel that fear.  I guess that’s why I’m writing about it again.  I’m dissecting the event, seeking the broken within the dark shadows. 

Dying would have been an easier alternative, but apparently at that moment I believe that I chose life and was deemed worthy to receive such a blessing.  So I rose from the ashes, by drawing strength from prayers of loved ones. 

Although I was supported by my wife and friends who lived nearby, the event actually brought me closer to my family up North.  My brother, whom I considered the biggest asshole I ever knew, suddenly turned into a decent human being.  Although they were nine hundred miles away, I could feel the love and concern in their voices daily. Their love lifted me high with each call I received; a testament to the power of the heart and mind. 

It is said that the third eye is a call to accept this world as ours and to heal and love it.  I am moved by a mighty hand. My purpose is to heal and love.  

It really is up to us as to whether we want to live or not.  Only when we hand that responsibility over to others do we relinquish our power; our strength.

Six months later I found myself in the hospital with the exact same problem, a puncture in the pipeline so to speak.  The doctors determined that I was too weak for surgery, and sent me home after two weeks in the hospital, with drain tubes extending from my sides. Two little plastic containers that they referred to as grenades captured and contained the poison from inside.

The very same day I was released, my mom was admitted in a hospital up North, after suffering from a stroke.  My world was falling apart. 

A very dear friend and spiritual teacher whom I often sought advice from believed that my sickness may have had been a product of an unforgiving memory that I had suppressed.  We had discussed this six months back.  My relationship with my mother came to mind back then, and here now we both were hospitalized back to back.     “What the hell is happening?  What’s going on?”

I thought I had forgiven my mom long ago, but something wasn’t right.  I am more powerful than this! 

And at that moment I closed my eyes and saw myself taking my power back as my fist cracked the ground beneath.  I visualized my mom and I connected to the source above by white light.  The power that flowed through me I shared with my mom here on Earth. 

Two or three days later, my mom was discharged from the hospital.  No side effects, even though there was evidence that she had suffered minor strokes in the past. 

There is heavy power in our thoughts and actions.  Not only did I heal, but my mom had recovered as well.  We all have purpose and power. Never underestimate the impact that you have on this Earthly plain.  Our words, our thoughts, and our actions regardless of job title, if any at all, can change the world! 

 

"If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves." - Thomas Edison